Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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