I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
