this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
So many bounce houses so little time
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
God I need to hump something, right now.
Randomize