Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
