she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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