In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Randomize