Don't you send me to vm
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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