i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I slept in bed with them the night they met. I once peed on the bride. And now I get to give a speech at their wedding. Piece of cake.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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