He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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