so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
