i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Randomize
