Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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