you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
