Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
how drunk are you?
Several
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
