I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
