Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize
