drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Randomize
