Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize
