I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
