K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Randomize