it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Randomize
