I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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