I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Randomize
