i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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