I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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