I cockslap morals
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Randomize