omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
