we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
