Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
