kristin has been a bad kristin
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
