I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
