brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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