My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
