Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
