There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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