Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Randomize
