I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Randomize