shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Im part way to drunk.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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