I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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