Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Randomize
