You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize