Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
