but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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