and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Randomize
