i don't like sucking hair
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize