My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
