ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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