yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
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