Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
