note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize