3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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