I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
they're like a gay fantastic four
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
