i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
